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my thoughts
Journey of a Lost Soul
Friday, 10 October 2008
Another day, another thought
Mood:  sad
Topic: my thoughts

I said something to myself and thought:

"Today, someone special today doesn't seem to be feeling well.
If I could do anything to make her feel better I'll do everything."

Wanna know why? Sometimes things are better felt than an answer through words.
Each time I see you that way makes we want to see your smiling face again.
I don't have the power of a God to, but I still have a heart and...
I hope you get better soon...


(Guys, am I finally going soft????) 

Posted by ninezero000 at 7:40 AM JST
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Thursday, 18 September 2008
The Wanderer's Way
Topic: my thoughts

I travel alone on a long and dusty road.

I walk the path of a wanderer, always lost and never to be found. Walking tirelessly on the hard ground.

Wandering the endless road, I encounter desolate souls that dare stand against fate.  I stand, watch and listen as a witness to what they do that only few may see as great.

I sat down to let myself rest. And I notice someone closing in from behind, stumbling along the way. The clumsy man finally gave up and sat right next to me and asked "Is this the right way?" I sighed and asked back "To where?" The man seemed to stare blankly ahead. "I thought somebody was with me, I tried to see but he left me along the way." I looked around and was puzzled by the man's words. "That man disappeared???" I asked. The man then stood up. Still staring blankly, he smiled. "Sorry, I thought you've noticed. But I'm actually blind." I stood up myself and looked a bit closely. And realized what he had meant. His eyes were unmoving, always looking straight. It was a shame, he had eyes as blue as the sky.  I held on to the stranger's arm and asked "I think I' going your way. Want to join me?" I could see a faint smile form on his face. With nothing else to do, I led the way.

As we exchanged stories, I realized that he was abandoned as a child. Was disowned and set aside. He was raised by a man equally frustrated with him and kicked him out as he grew older. "By the way my name's Silas. Thanks for giving me a hand. I'm actually on the way to my job." I was puzzled on what kind of job he would be in for his 'situation.'  As he talked more about his sad life, i could see tears form on the corners of his eyes. Silas worked because 

We were nearing the place where he worked. It was a shoe factory of some sort. Silas looked at me and said one last thing before going in. "Even if the world was unkind, even if I lost my way, I somehow found a person kind enough to help." I turned my back and began to walk away. I slowly whispered into the wind, hoping my words would get to Silas. "You might not see the world, but your heart has given you better sight than your eyes..." I finally walked away.

The wanderer shall forever roam. Acting as a witness to the struggle of life. And the small triumphs of man overcoming their bleak destinies.

Posted by ninezero000 at 8:34 AM JST
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Tuesday, 16 September 2008
The lone soldier
Mood:  on fire

He roamed the world with no end. Walking dark, empty streets with nothing but the sound of his tired feet.

The soldier without an army. Fighting without the aid of any.

Nothing but the weapon by his side. To defend himself when the world lied.

Fighting forward always giving it his best. Never knowing the value of getting rest.

Not noticing his own tears. He moves on and faces his fears.

Always at war with faceless shadows. Long does he dream of resting in quiet meadows.

But before he can end the fight, he must search for what is right...

The real answer for his long and painful cry. Before the world can again lie.

Posted by ninezero000 at 7:39 AM JST
Updated: Tuesday, 16 September 2008 8:00 AM JST
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Monday, 15 September 2008
someone special
Mood:  hug me
Topic: my thoughts

I am one, myself, alone and nothing more. I am a soul that wanders the world endlessly with no purpose. To others I may be deemed as something yet nothing at the same time. I am a lone wolf that hunts and lives for himself. That was what I thought I may be, until I found something... Someone that makes me think that I may actually something... Something of value...

Honestly, I met someone that was worth my time. Someone worth visiting and checking on from time to time. That person was someone I would hold dearly and close to my heart. That was a person that let me be who I really am, and never asked me to be someone I'm not.

She may be the first person that I cared about and nothing more. From me, she asked nothing more.

I thought I threw away my heart and buried it six feet under. Lying to myself that I would never use my it again because I had no more reasons of keeping it. You were there to help me find it, and put the pieces back together again.

 To sum it all up, that was someone I can give my whole heart to without hiding anything else. Knowing you made me thankful the bullet never fired when I got the chance the first time. Life's full of second chances, maybe this is another one?

Posted by ninezero000 at 4:40 AM JST
Updated: Monday, 15 September 2008 5:19 AM JST
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Monday, 25 August 2008
Sweet Beginnings

Rune Isenhart and Charm Lancaster have been the best of friends since they started working together as writers for a local newspaper.  Ever since then, the two were inseparable. Rune was a brilliant man. An excellent writer, talented artist and an excellent mechanic. Most people thought his philosophies and ideas were radical or different. People mocked him, treated him indifferently. But only one person always thought that Rune was something special.

 Ever since Rune met charm, his world turned around. Somebody finally accepts him for who he was and nothing more and best of yet someone who puts value into everything that Rune is.  Charm was Rune's exact polar opposite, she was kind, firendly and always warm-hearted. On the day they first met, Rune sat all alone as always at his station always trying to find a good way of making a headache for himself. Charm stood right next to him and smiled. "What're you up to?" she said. Rune took a glance over his shoulder and saw her. He found it a bit interesting since nobody ever approached him that way before. For the first time in Rune's slightly askew life, somebody was at least trying to be nice. He looked back and gave her a warm smile of his own. "Hi..." he said softly.

After that day, they've been seeing each other frequently. Rune always dropped by Charm's neat and well-organized desk.  He was fond of dropping by for a little talk since she was the only one who ever listened to him with interest and an open heart. As the days and months passed, their bond grew stronger and they got to know each other by heart.

Then, after a few years have passed; civil war broke out in the city that they both lived in. Having a father who used to be with the army, Rune naturally enlisted to the army to serve his patriotic duty. He never broke out the news to Charm, he thought that telling her  about it would break her heart. They went on with their usual lives in the office with Rune trying to pretend like nothing was going on.

Unfortunately, Charm chanced to see Rune's recruitment papers lying on his recognizably cluttered desk. One glance alone, she turned back and looked down. Rune came back to his usual, messy desk and found a note. It read: "Meet me at the rooftop..." The not had no name, but he knew there was only one who had that handwriting.

Rune arrived at the rooftop. Greeted by a chilling breeze, he stepped forth to find charm staring out to the horizon. Rune got a bit closer and placed his hand over her shoulder. Charm brushed his hand off and faced him. He looked deep into her eyes, it was a look he never saw in her face before. "Why?" She shuddered. He sighed back and said. "My life's a mess, I want to straighten it ou..." Tears began to well up in her eyes. Rune couldn't continue on, he wouldn't want to see her cry. Instead, he took her into his arms like it was his last and whispered softly to her. "I made this choice... But being with you taught me something important. You gave me a reason to carry on with my life... You are the reason why I made this choice. One man can make a difference in this world and i want to make it better for the both of us." Charm pressed herself closer to rune knowing that she couldn't take it anymore. Rune cleared his throat and continued.  "I'll be back, I promise... You know why? It's because I love you. I have no other reason why..." Rune kissed Charm like it was their first. They both stood there until the night faded into light.

 Rune has been away for over a month of service and Charm hasn't heard from him since they parted. Someone came knocking on Charm's door. As she opened the door, an officer wearing a formal army-issued garb handed her a letter. "My name's Major. Thomas" Mr. Isenhart requested to send this letter in the untimely event that he passes away. We still haven't found him for weeks now and I fear that the worst has happened. Charm fell on her knees, overwhelmed by sorrow. she didn't know what to do. "He promised..."

It has been over 14 days since Rune was reported missing or K.I.A.(killed in action). A few days later, Charm heard someone knocking on the door. Tears rolled on her cheeks as she saw the figure standing before her. The man looked a bit worse for wear, but was still in one piece. The man smiled. "I've kept my promise..." Charm couldn't hold herself back and leapt into the man's arms. It was Rune, alive and well. "I cheated death just to be with you again... Nothing stops me from keeping my promise." He pulled out a small box and opened it before her. It was a diamond ring. Rune took a deep breath and flustered a bit but finaly was able to say what he needed to."Charm, will you be..." She looked at Rune and said "Yes." no other answer was needed. Charm took the ring and examined it. Something was inscribed on the inside it read "Not even death stopped me from coming back to you"

Posted by ninezero000 at 4:42 AM JST
Updated: Monday, 25 August 2008 6:31 AM JST
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Sunday, 24 August 2008
7 dead roses
Mood:  sad
Topic: my thoughts

I woke up with a thought that bothered me. Something I've kept to myself for the past few years.

 I remembered 7 people. I realized falling for them was a bad idea.

1.) Never cared enough to do anything

2.) Always wanted more, and more

3.) A storm of fury and complaints

4.) Always wanted to be branded beside my name

5.) Pretended and never cared

6.) Expected so much but never satisfied

7.) Never content

All seven, never to be remebered. Came back in a flash. It reminded me why I'm always so cold and heartless.

7 reasons why I literally pulled up a gun to my face and pulled the trigger Yell. I guess fate seriously saved my my brain that time from being blown to bits. I wonder what comes next... 

Posted by ninezero000 at 4:44 AM JST
Updated: Tuesday, 23 September 2008 6:59 AM JST
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